Amazon reviews

Today has been a little intense at work, so I found myself in need of something to take my mind off it. Talking with a work colleague about incredibly expensive high-end audio equipment reminded me about Denon's $500 ethernet cable, something which usually costs about $1/m. While Googling for a good reference to it, I came across Amazon's review page of the cable, and laughed until I cried.

based on the superb reviews, I am buying this fabled equipment as a gift for my wife, in time for our 4th anniversary. I think it would make for a beautiful necklace.

I bought this cable but it refused to plug into my Samsung and Pioneer equipment. When I forced it to connect with them anyway, it killed itself in shame. So I ordered a replacement, but instead of plugging it into inferior devices I plugged it into my Apple Powerbook. There was a brief shudder in the room and a wormhole formed where my bedroom wall had been.

I'm kicking myself for not buying on Amazon. I picked up this bad boy in a retail store for what I thought was a bargain closeout price of $749.99, but logging on here, I realize that stupid Radio Shack has ripped me off yet again.

I bought this cable for my new HiFi system because I heard that this is the same one that industry professionals rely on every day for their most complex sound patterns.

As a stress test, I used my stereo with this new cable to watch an Eddie Izzard standup routine I'd recorded on VHS. Let me tell you, the difference in sound was PHENOMENAL. With this new cable, I can suddenly understand every word he says as if he were speaking in a Midwestern American accent. Also, now the tape shows him dressed in men's clothes. For this, I give Denon ten stars.

However, there are some drawbacks to this wonderful new technology. My CDs still skip occasionally, although I probably just need to throw out my audio rack and invest in building a new one from scratch--I doubt the cable is at fault. Also, whenever I try to give it a bath, it refuses to let me remove its nylon covering, or allow me to be in the room when it is bare. However, I suppose this should be expected from a higher quality product. When I buy my companionship, the more expensive ones are a little more particular about nudity protocol.

Overall, an excellent investment for anyone who needs a friend.

Suddenly life doesn't seem so bad, although I do have a bit of a stitch from laughing.